Day 19: Cultivating Community

Community requires commitment. Here is the list of of the nine characteristics of bibilical fellowship:

We share our true feelings (authenticity)
We encourage each other (mutuality)
WE support each other (sympathy)
We forgive each other (mercy)
We speak the truth in love (honesty)
We admit our weaknesses (humility)
We respect our differences (courtesy)
We don't gossip (confidentiality)
We make group a priority (frequency)

When I read the lesson today explaining how all these were important for community building immediately I started to think about which of these characteristics was I good at and which ones I need the most development. I pondered this questions and decided that I would have to challenge myself the most in the area of humility. At first I thought, I don't act like I got the big head all the time and I can accept others and follow their lead sometimes. So I thought I was good at being humble but when I thought a little more about the statememt above "admitting my weaknesses" I had to be honest and say I am not good at being humble. My inability to admit my weaknesses are rooted in the fact that I don't want to give anyone any thing that they can use to hurt me or judge me. I often say I am a good friend to people but I don't always allow them to be good friends to me. I think I started to keep people at a distance and not trust them with my weaknesses in grade school. ( I can't believe I can remember that far back! LOL) I had this group of girls who I thought were my best friends in the world. We did everything together or should I say they did everything I said do. I thought they were really my friends until one day I was late meeting the group and happened to show up at our spot late and without them knowing that I was around the corner. I heard them talking about me and saying things about me that really hurt my feelings. These were girls who had stayed at my house, went to dinner with me and my parents, met my Muddear, etc. I thought we were tight and I heard them making fun of me for crying about some family issues and me being afraid to sleep with the lights off. Now as petty as this sounds, I never forgot that I heard them talking about me and what I thought were major secrets about me and my issues.

I don't remember how I reacted or if I called them on talking about me (knowing me I am sure I did and it wasn't nice) but I can say for that day forward I am a little guarded and I don't show my weaknessess to people in general or close friends.

Now what is my challenge - I am certainly not planning to bleed all over people but for those folks who I need to be in community with I am deciding today to turn in my superwoman tights and wonderwoman outfit (even though I might keep the braclets LOL!).

Hit me back about which of these characteristics hit home with you.

Blessings,
Felicia Kennedy (aka Flea - yes at one time I was a size 0 and now ......)